In a court judgment Mrs Brexit Owens was told by His Honour Judge Tolson QC that she could not trigger her divorce from her husband E.U Owens. Brexit Owens had planned to trigger her divorce on the 29th of March.

The position now is uncertain. The decision leaves Brexit Owens locked forever in what for her is a loveless marriage. However, the judge did not accept that her grounds for triggering her divorce were as unreasonable as she maintained. Brexit had claimed that E.U had been unreasonable, but the judge held that there was no factual evidence to support her claims although he accepted that her feelings were genuine.

The judge after hearing detailed submissions from Mr Philip Marshall QC, an unlikely compassionate supporter of Brexit Owens but nonetheless honouring the CAB rank principle that the marriage to E.U. was hopeless and without any prospects of reconciliation. Mrs Brexit Owens had complained that E.U had spent all her money and he had nothing to show for it. Further, that E.U had restricted her rights to behave in any way she sought fit, which she claimed were derived from the Magna Carter. Finally, that he had allowed far too many other people into their relationship. However, HHJ Tolson rejected the divorce describing the evidential claims for divorce. The judge described the claims as “hopeless”, “anodyne”, “scrapping the barrel” and “lacking le roast boeuf”.

The judge therefore dismissed the divorce application and they all lived happily after.